family life

And baby makes 3

Abacus at less than a month old, and Mittens singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars to him.

I was never much of a kid-person – heck, I never really thought about the whole getting married and having children thing until I met my husband, and even then, he was much more sure about wanting to at least try for kids than I was. I even had doubts of my maternal instincts, and I definitely did not think I’d be enjoying motherhood as much as I do today.

We visited a friend with twins recently, and while we were there, I asked Mittens, “When there are two babies, what are they called?” I expected him to say “twins”, but instead he answered, “Double trouble!”. That is my motto for 2 kids – Double trouble, but twice the fun.

Any parent with 2 kids will definitely agree that 2 is so different from having just 1, and it can really be quite a handful. Sometimes I see parents with only 1 child, and I have a kind of envy for them. I know that if I only had Mittens, I’d be less harried, would have more time and attention for him, and so much more time to myself. Sometimes when one is napping or sleeping, I feel like I really have the luxury and quality of time with the other.

These last 2 years have certainly be tough, but as Abacus grows older and both play more and more together (apart from the times or days when I seem to do nothing but playing referee between the two of them), the joy of seeing them enjoy each other’s company is definitely more rewarding than we’d ever imagined. Sometimes, they’d be giggling together, sometimes when one wakes from his nap, the other will run to him to give him a hug (kind of like, “HEY! Glad you’re awake, let’s play!”). Moments like those (when they’re not fighting), are priceless. Of course, there definitely are the moments when they’re trying to kill each other too, but I’m sure those are priceless in their own way too.

And although, as I’ve mentioned before, that people have all kinds of comments when they see that you have 2 boys, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I think they have a wonderful boy-bond and I’m hoping that this will make it a wee bit easier when their little sister arrives. I’m pleasantly surprised, and thankful, that both of them love babies – Abacus always wants to take a look at them or pat them, and Mittens could not keep his hands off the twins, exclaiming, “Such cute toes, mummy!!!”

Some people have asked if we tried for another baby because we wanted a girl, but to us any healthy baby is a blessing. Others have said that we’re brave to have a third, something that the hubby and I don’t really get. In order to be brave, you need fear. And fear, I do not have. I just have limited energy 🙂 Some of my childless and gay friends are also happy for us and jokingly said they need more people like us to add to the population since they aren’t! lol.

Although I know there are going to be some days when I think, “WTH have I gotten myself into?!”, I know that we will never have regrets. I don’t want to go past my child bearing years into our silver years wondering whether we should have had another child, and with me available at home most of the time to watch and tend to the kids, we both felt that we should at least try to see if we would be bestowed another little gift. We’ve been immensely blessed, although this time the journey has been definitely more tiring and my body is definitely feeling its age now, especially since I’m at my most unfit in years! We will have to figure out how to fit everyone into our tiny shoebox of an apartment, and other logistics, but in the big picture, these are just small obstacles that are temporary. And I know that the first two years (or the first twenty?) are going to be toughest, but having had the boys, I know that things will get easier as they grow older. Eventually.

Someone once told me that children pick their parents, and I love that thought – that they choose us, despite our flaws and inexperience; and entrust us with their lives. It’s also a great reminder of what wonderful gifts children are, because God knows it can be trying being a parent. It’s going to be an interesting, busy year for us soon and we couldn’t be more delighted. After all, the more the merrier, right? 😉

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4 thoughts on “And baby makes 3

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